Jim’s Bright Idea

THANK YOU

Wed, 9 Jul 2008 09:45:25 -0500

Time to put this stage of JBI to bed. Re-union was a ringing success in
general and so was JBI, in particular.

Your support for JBI generated over $13,000- in contributions to Carleton's
Sustainability Revolving Fund. These were “extra funds” - money which would
have otherwise languished under your mattresses or buried in milk cans in
your back yards. AND, this extra effort took our class gift to the high
side of the $300,000- mark!

You have invested this money in the best possible savings vehicle – in the
minds of the generation whose challenge it will be to put the planet right.
Celebrate. Pour yourselves a collective tall glass of ice-cold ginger ale
and break open a brand new box of nutty bars. Not you, Karsten; you still
owe me one.

I like to think of the SRF and other vehicles like it as my own personal
terrestrial retirement account with the planet as the capital, clean air and
water as the earned interest and the kids as the fund managers. I think I
might just retire early. Thanks to each and every person who contributed!

Some highlights of the re-union for me (feel free to add your own to the
comments!):

1. Jim Gramentine's comment to me that JBI "was half the reason [he was]
there;

2. The astounding reception and success of JBI (and the ride up there and
not coming off of "Ginger Ail" as I rode down the aisle in the chapel with
the check);

3. Not being bested in the 5k foot race by Sarah Goetz, running on one good
knee cap and one intact hamstring, total;

4. Remembering our pal Jeff Hart and other departed classmates in a quiet
moment with Gil Hernandez;

5. Being asked to dance for the first time ever by a pretty girl at a
Sayles-Hill campus party;

6. Seeing Steve Harvey (the man never changes) and scoring a double-handed,
diagonal chest slash on both him and Jaco before either could "crane" in
defense; and

7. Meeting up with Mark Gonzalez to shake hands and drive the golden spike
in Northfield. Well done, Gonz.

Some thank you’s are in order as well. Hats off to:

The class of 1983. “Class” is the perfect word to use for this amazing
crew. Stefanie Morrison, Katy DeSalvo, Don Frost and Pete Gruman of the
gift committee. Chase Turner. My hosts enroute: John and Missy Stempien in
Kalamazoo. Bill and Beth Andersen in Milwaukee. Nick Gardner and Theresa
Stanislo in St. Paul and Ken and Heather (Beal) Potts in Edina. Every
single soul involved in planning our 25th re-union celebration. My family.

Anyway, I am back to napping at my desk and doing Sudoku while my staff does
all the work here in my office. Here is what I look like doing that. See
you all next time.

Jim Haughn

NO SIDE!!!

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:42:01 -0500

Amigos:

My last blog from the road. I wish this wasn’t so close to over.

Stage 5 Madison WI to Tomah WI 2008-06-11, Wednesday:

Leaving Madison on Wednesday, 2008-06-11 meant that I had to miss out on the graduation and dance of Robert Quintana’s 8th grad class. Dernit. But I was anxious to get back on the road given the all the rain of in Southern Wisconsin. But hold on, not so fast. First, I had to fix 2 flat tires, purchasing 4 inner tubes in the process, 3 of which I busted right off before I figured out that I needed to knock down a burr which had self-generated on the inside of my tire rim don’t ask me how. I am now quite proficient at changing out bike tires so now you know who to call. Oh, and if you are looking to do a little bike related shopping and desire to be treated generously and with appreciation like a normal ham and eggs customer don’t go to Middleton Cycle, Middleton, Wisconsin. Not a nice man.

Anyway, I got on the road by about 11:30 am out of the Madison area and rode hard all day long, with a tail wind, up to Tomah, a distance of about 130 miles. I was on a mission. It took me about 8 hours of Saddle Time and 10 hours of total time, including a stop at the public library in Mauston to check my e-mail. Easily my best day in the straps. Bully.

Stage 6 Tomah WI to Eau Claire WI 2006-06-12, Thursday:

Thursday started out bad and just got worser. There don’t nothing discourage like rain and wind and yet another bike problem as if yesterday’s glitches weren’t enough. Turns out that my repeated attempts to fix my rear tire the day before resulted in compromising the bead on one edge of the tire and a bulge developed in that area when it was inflated. It did hold air, but, on every revolution, there was a high spot. As a result, I endured 27 miles of "whompa-whompa-whompa-whompa" from Tomah to Black River Falls, Wisconsin before I limped into Pearson's Sport Shop plenty big tired by that time of that music, I can tell you. Todd, the owner, was sorry to tell me that his mechanic father was just then laid up in the hospital with a heart attack but that I was welcome to use his tools which Todd told me his father had been fixing bikes with since the 1940's. How cool is that?

The sport of cycling can be that way sometimes and the spirit of service which you will find lacking at Middleton Cycle you will definitely find firmly in place at Pearson's Sport Shop in Black River Falls, Wisconsin. You can also get your cross- or compound bow dialed in just in time for deer season while your there. Todd sold me a new tire and I was back on the road in about 30 minutes time. From there it was up to Eau Claire where Bob Bradovich (’82) the sports guy at WQOW channel 18 became the first non-retiree / non-disabled American vet to take me up on my standing offer to bike with me. AND HE GOT ME ON TV!!! HI MOM!!! Many thanks to both Bob and to Ben the WQOW reporter for their support of JBI.

Stage 7: Eau Claire WI to St. Paul MN 2008-06-13, Friday:

My last day in Wisco was 2008-06-13, Friday the 13th. I am not superstitious, but something was definitely up that day. It was a 103 mile stage into the teeth of a discourteous, implacable, inhuman west wind which did not even break for dinner which I assumed anything working that hard for that long would have to do. Wrongo, chap. Here is a picture of the west-wind flag at Erin Prairie, Wisconsin at about mid-day and 600 miles into my trip. Humbug indeed:

Then there were the two teenage cowheads at the BP in New Richmond, Wisconsin who insisted that the road from their store straight WEST to the St. Croix River crossing at Stillwater was far longer (and therefore NOT the way to go) than going NORTH up to New Richmond and then SOUTHWEST back down the hypotenuse to the river bridge at Stillwater. I finally just gave up when, as I stood before the clerk in a bicycle helmet, spandex padded shorts and a cycling jersey, she repeated, again: "sir, it really is faster if you just drive up to New Richmond." I sure hope stupid don’t catch.

But the river card of the most frustrating day of my trip thus far had to have been the fearsome fourlegged man-eater who chose me to harass for at least a quarter mile of bumpy windy busy Wisco county road like I was some kind of osama bin laden or something. Believe me, by that time I was just trying to put that little patch of hell far behind me but this mutt would have none of it. He was just a little snack of a dog, but very bothersome and irritating nonetheless. I am usually animal-neutral at worst and, once you understand how a dog thinks (they just want you to leave their property - you just want you to leave their property - you're both on the same page), you can manage just about any barking, howling, yelping, growling, snarling, ill-behaved cur. But this creature was not to be denied. In all fairness, I did warn him (“mister, I’m askin’ you nice .... ") I am a little ashamed to admit to the satisfaction of the feeling of my heel connect with his jaw and the yelp of shock and surprise that followed. Later, I cooled off and said a little prayer of contrition. Sorry Fluffy.

I finally wobbled into St. Paul to the home of Nick and Theresa, my hosts before I go over to Heather and Ken’s house and make them wish Heather had just sat on her hands and not responded to my very first e-mail asking for hosts in the Twin Cities before re-union.. Nick is an old law school mate of mine who makes the best cup of Turkish coffee I think I have ever had. Theresa, to her credit, did not tire of (or maybe just admit to tiring of) listening to my offbeat theories, even the one where gravity is caused by clouds. She’s a good sport. Thanks to you for opening your home to me.

Anyways, I’m here. Next stop, Northfield. See you Thursday at the re-enactment! I think the gang may just pull it off this time. Let’s have fun.

Oh, here are the numbers:

STAGE 5: Madison WI to Tomah WI 2008-06-11, Wednesday:

Miles: 132.07 / Saddle Time: 8:08 / Calories: 5,141 / Fat: 507 grams

STAGE 6: Tomah WI to Eau Claire WI 2008-06-12, Thursday:

Miles: 83.53 / Saddle Time: 5:43 / Calories: 2,359 / Fat: 408 grams

STAGE 7: Eau Claire WI to St. Paul MN 2008-06-13, Friday (hosts, Nick
Gardner and Theresa Stanislo):

Miles: 103.14 / Saddle Time: 11:18 / Calories: 3,712 / Fat: 263 grams

2cnd 40 (nearly) Totals (Madison WI to St. Paul MN):

Miles: 318.74 / Saddle Time: 25:09 / Calories: 11,212 / Fat: 1,178 grams

Halfside (nearly) Totals (Napoleon OH to Madison WI):

Miles: 324.97 / Saddle Time: 25:04 / Calories: 12,247 / Fat: 1,391 grams

Noside Totals (Napoleon OH to St. Paul MN):

Total Miles: 643.71 / Total Saddle Time: 50:13 / Total Calories: 23,459 /
Total Fat: 2,569 grams

Making A List, Checking It Twice...

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 11:09:19 -0500

Making A List, Checking It Twice....
by Mark A. Gonzalez

Jim Haughn has been on the road for three days. He’s got a big ferry ride coming up today or tomorrow. I’m not sure what kind of sustainability campaign he’s on, but I’m sure there will be lots of tanning oil and cocktails on deck. Me, I’m wishing I was on the road already, but there are projects to complete, incomplete projects to handoff to colleagues, and packing.

Got a list, got several lists. A list of things to do, a list of things to pack, a list of dreams to fulfill. Think I’ll make a few lists while on the trip to Northfield. Here’s a list of lists, including those completed and to be completed.
1. A list of lists (check).
2. A list of names for the bike. Peter Gruman suggested this task a long time ago. Great idea. Perhaps a name will suddenly materialize around mile 397 or in the middle of some road calamity. Or perhaps it will become apparent during a stirring sunrise or view from the crest of an especially high glacial moraine (see below.)
3. List of top road songs—Jim’s list is a bit unfocused. This is strictly saddle music (see below.)
4. List of things I fear most (see below.)
5. List of interesting personalities I encounter on the road.
6. List of birds seen and/or heard on the trip. I’m shooting for 100 species. Should make the miles go by more enjoyably.
7. List of food and drink consumed with a calculation of calories consumed. This might suggest that a straight cocktail of cellulosic ethanol might be the way to go.

Naming the Steed

In the course of a typical year, I spend hundreds of miles, sometimes thousands, and scores of hours in the saddle. That’s a lot of time with something between your legs. Anything that spends that much time where it does really ought to have a name.

Here’s a few of the contenders.

Manitou. The attraction is apparent if you happen to be a native of the Dakotas or perhaps an aficionado of one of the most famous figures in history to reside in Dakota Territory—Theodore Roosevelt. Roosevelt had a handful of horses, but his favorite steed was Manitou.

High Plains Drifter. Rolling across the dead-ice moraine, Missouri Breaks, and Missouri Slope qualifies as High Plains drifting. But the more I think about the name, the more it seems to be a moniker for me and not the bike.

Bullseye. What, you haven’t heard of Bullseye? That’s the name of Woody’s horse in Toy Story II, an oft seen movie if you happen to have three pre-schoolers. What, you don’t have pre-schoolers anymore? Maybe you’d like to ask me about the little blue pill? It’s never too late to be a daddy of a newborne, just ask Picasso or Tony Randall.

Cool Breeze. This is one of Jim Haughn’s suggestions. I’ll give him points for romanticism, but couldn’t commandeer a name that I know he is deeply fond of.

Headwind. Still can’t quite figure out how I can ride a circle and have to contend with a headwind the entire way. Must be this corriolis thing that physicists and meteorologists keep ranting about..

Barbaro. R.I.P. We all know what happened to that fine, unfortunate steed.

Big Brown. Ditto.

And the top nomination—pending an irresistible suggestion from a reader:
Painted Pony. Be the first to name the song with a painted pony, and I’ll buy you a cold one.

Top Songs for the Road

1. Slow Ride Foghat
2. The Long and Winding Road Beatles
3. King of the Road Roger Miller
4. Sentimental Journey Les Brown
5. Spinning Wheel Blood, Sweat, and Tears
6. Ramble On Led Zeppelin
7. Bike Pink Floyd
8. Bicycle Race Queen
9. Rockin’ Down the Highway Doobie Brothers
10. I can see for Miles and Miles The Who
11. On the Road Again Willie Nelson
12. Rambling on my Mind Eric Clapton
13. Life is a Highway Rascal Flatts
14. Back in the Saddle Aerosmith
15. Got to Keep on Rolling U.S. Marine Corps jogging song
16. Over the Hills and Far Away Led Zeppelin
17. Highway Blues Marc Seales
18. Road Man Smash Mouth
19. Tempo Perdido Pink Martini
20. Cross Road Blues Robert Johson
21. They Call Me the Breeze J.J. Cale/Eric Clapton
22. The Big Country Talking Heads
23. Road Rage Rhonda Vincent and the Rage
24. The Road Goes on Forever The Highwaymen
25. Going Mobile The Who
26. The Road Less Traveled George Straight
27. Everyday is a Winding Road Sheryl Crow
28. Blue on Black Kenny Wayne Sheppard
29. A Hard Road John Mayall and the Blues Breakers
30. Down the Big Road Blues Lucinda Williams
31. Poor Little Critter on the Road The Knitters
32. Pedal your Blues Away R Crumb and His Cheap Suit Serenaders
33. Good Times Roll The Cars
34. Roadblock Janis Joplin
35. Crosstown Traffic Jimi Hendrix
36. I Yell at Traffic Leo Kottke
37. Traffic Jam James Taylor
38. Comfortably Numb Pink Floyd
39. Tall in the Saddle Joan Armatrading
40. Beast of Burden Rolling Stones
41. Back in the Saddle Again Gene Autry
42. On the Road to Find Out Cat Stevens
43. Six Days on the Road Jackson Brown
44. Against the Wind Bob Seger
45. Roll on Down the Highway Bachman-Turner Overdrive
46. Highway Chile Jimi Hendrix
47. Pedal Your Blues Away R Crumb and his Cheap Suit Serenaders
48. Road to Nowhere Talking Heads
49. Forty Miles of Bad Road Duane Eddy
50. Zippadee Doo Dah Wrubel/Gilbert

List of Things I Fear Most

10) Dogs. Closest I ever came to eternity was during the 1981 bike ride when a pack of wild dogs, many wolf- and coyote-like, chased me down on the Blackfoot Reservation. Youth, a shot of adrenaline, and fear of being delimbed saved me by a couple feet.
9) Logging trucks and their drivers. Apologies to the descendants and loved ones of logging-truck drivers, but they are a few chromosomes shy of hominids with no evidence of respect, compassion, or love for bikers. I’ll gladly eat the paper this is printed on when evidence to the contrary is forthcoming.
8) Fresh chip seal and tar. Yuck.
7) Rumble strips. Does this need elaboration?
6) Detours and road construction.
5) Hail stones. Can you say meat tenderizer?
4) The Sleeping Johnson. This is like taint. If I gotta explain it, you don’t needz ta know.
3) Bonking. I’d rather be treated for the bends, nitrogen narcosis, than go through the unbonking process.
2) Kansas or Oz, take your pick. I don’t want to see no Toto dogs, wicked witches, flying monkeys, or munchkins. I’m undecided about Dorothy.
1) A town without a Dairy Queen. What a downer, when all I really want from this trip is an excuse to eat unlimited numbers of Oreo, Heath Bar, and Turtle Blizzards.

If all goes well, I’ll see some of you in Northfield. If not, I’ll try to catch up with you at the 30th reunion. Jim, we can’t both have tailwinds, but here’s hoping you get your share.

High Plains Drifter

Halfway !!!

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 10:19:38 -0500

Halfway!!!

Well almost. I met my computer in Madison, so I thought I would drop an update. Generally, things are just ducky. I am happy, well-rested and supremely content. I think I'll quit my job. Here is more detail:

Stage 1 was a tough. I was fired up but it was very, very hot. My brother Ross rode it with me from Napoleon to Coldwater MI. Taking a page from the script of "Breaking Away," Ross did this first leg in gym shorts, a plain white undershirt and flip flops. Ross had suffered some physical injuries in service to our country in the Marine Corps, but like a true devildog, he did not let on and he endured it all like a champ. It was windy too, but, luckily, the wind was from the South, pushing us along through NW Ohio and Southern MI quite nicely, thank you. Ross later told me that he had not been on a bicycle at all - let alone a 90 mile death ride - in over 3 years. Ross is a perfect example of what our service men and women are capable of. My thanks to all of you who now serve or have served our country in the armed forces.

On Stage 2, I was hosted by Michelle Burkhead Stempien (1993) and her husband John and children Emma and Josh. They live north of Kalamazoo approximately 15 miles. I met her on the way through at the Kalamazoo Institute of Arts arts fair in downtown Kalamazoo. Michelle is the Curator of Education at KIA. I hit K'zoo at 8:30 am after having left Coldwater at 5 am and I probably could have pushed on to the Muskegon ferry. I would have missed the generous hospitality of Michelle and John, though. I am glad I stopped for a nice meal, Saturday evening mass and a good sleep. I set out for the ferry the next day in a light rain.

Stage 3 consisted of biking the balance of Michigan to Muskegon and the ferry, ferrying over to Milwaukee and then biking a short distance from the lakefront to the home of my hosts, Bill and Beth Andersen, in Wauwatosa. Bill and Beth met me at the ferry and Bill rode with me to their lovely home in Wauwatosa, an inner-ring suburb of Milwaukee. I owe Bill and Beth a huge debt of gratitude and I would no doubt still be circling Milwaukee aimlessly were it not for them. Plus, I got to be in a parade in Milwaukee. Here's a picture:

Bill and Beth's son Steve, graduated in 1992 from Carleton. He is married to Beth Potts who graduated in 1991. Beth Potts is the sister of Ken Potts of 1983 and these arrangements were facilitated by Heather Beal Potts ('83), Ken's spouse. Steve and Beth live in Seattle and Ken and Heather live in Minneapolis. This was quite a logistical feat! There will be a test on this.

For those of you wondering, the Lake Michigan Crossing was no luxury cruise. There were 2 to 4 foot seas, so I spent most of the time in the hold praying that I would not embarrass myself all over my lap and the front of my shirt. Thankfully, I did not. But the little nipper across from me was not so lucky and she spent the better part of the crossing curled up in her father's arm's while he soothed and comforted his little angel. It was quite touching. Plus, I got to finish off the balance of her grilled cheese sandwich and chips! Yummy! Here is a picture off the stern. See.

(btw - Allyall probably know about the love affair between Ohio and Michigan. Woody Hayes is a demi-god in the Buckeye State, and deservedly so, no matter who you ask (yeah, yeah, so he had a little dust-up with an opposing player at the end of a nationally televised bowl game - guy had it coming). Anyway, they say that Woody Hayes, on recruiting trips to Michigan, would never let his assistants buy gas in that state. I didn't buy any gas either. In fact, I would say that I pretty much ate the State of Michigan's lunch. God bless you, Woody. In Tressel We Trust. Go Bux.)

Stage 4 consisted of biking from Wauwatosa to Madison to the home of my hosts, Steve and Carol (Murray) Quintana. They have a lovely home hard by the shores of Lake Mendota in Madison; I feel like I am at camp. I am always amazed at how well accomplished my classmates turn out; Steve and Carol have the nicest kids (Joe, Rob and Rosey) and enjoy a very comfortable existence here in Madison. Anyway, the trip here was uneventful with most of it done on the Glacial-Drumlin bike trail which runs from Waukesha to Madison. I hope to talk to media here today in Madison. Tonight there is a carry in picnic at Tenney Park on Lake Mendota. I hope somebody brings devilled eggs!!!

Finally, I just have to say that the responses to my open invite to bike with me on this caper have been tepid, at best. I am not even whelmed, let alone overly so. Ok, it's not like I expected to be some kind of sustainability pied piper, but I thought I would have more takers than 2 retirees and a disabled veteran. Maybe that will change by the next time I check in. Until then, Sempre Fi.

- Jim Haughn

Oh, yeah, here are my numbers to date:

Stage 1: from near McClure OH to Coldwater MI

Miles: 87.393 / Saddle Time: 6:26 / Calories 3287.6 / Fat: 396.7 grams

Stage 2: Coldwater MI to Otsego MI (North of Kalamazoo - hosts: John and Michelle (Burkhead) Stempien, Emma and Josh)

Miles: 67.967 / Saddle Time: 5:45 / Calories: 2685.4 / Fat: 331.5 grams

Stage 3: Otsego to Milwaukee (over Lake Michigan the lake on the ferry - hosts: Bill and Beth Andersen, parents of Steve Anderson '92)

Miles: 84.45 / Saddle Time: 6:11 / Calories 3265.4 / Fat: 386.8 grams

Stage 4: Milwaukee to Madison (hosts: Steve and Carol Quintana, Joe, Rob and Rosey)

Miles: 85.160 / Saddle Time: 7:42 / Calories: 3008 / Fat: 276 grams

Halfway (nearly) totals:

Total Miles: 324.97 / Total Saddle Time: 25:04 / Total Calories: 12247 / Total Fat: 1391 grams

The Three Men I Admire the Most

Tue, 3 Jun 2008 23:20:13 -0500

I leave the day after tomorrow. My brother Ross will do the first leg with me to Coldwater, Michigan. He is pumped up. So am I. I feel like the night before my first trip out of the country.

This has been alot of fun. Jim's Bright Idea has already raised almost $10,000- for Carleton's Sustainability Revolving Fund. Re-union hasn't even started yet. I will thank you all personally, of course, in Northfield when I see you and you will all no doubt buy me a cup of coffee and an egg salad sandwich. But, until then, let me take this opportunity to thank everyone who has been a part of JBI so far, from contributors, to re-union committee members, to administrators, to friends and family. Allyall know who you are.

And, as long as i have you here, let me take this opportunity to air some things for which I've never had a forum before and likely won't ever again in this setting, once this entry hits the blog. I have already bribed Chase to post this without telling Pete and Katy. They will no doubt pull me aside at re-union for a stern talking-to, but that is two weeks and 700 miles - a lifetime and universe - away. Sweet mother of pearl do i need this walkabout.

OK. Pay attention:

1. When you go shopping, be aware of the other shoppers around you. Don't park your cart cross-ways in the aisle and then stand on one end deciding between cream of mushroom or chicken noodle while your significant other stands on the other end of the cart mulling over rice or egg noodles. YOU (YES YOU) ARE BLOCKING THE ENTIRE AISLE. That line of carts and shoppers and screaming, snot-nosed ankle biters - they are unruly and discourteous because of you, believe it or not.

2. When you are in a line of cars waiting for the light to turn green. Keep your eyes on the light. Be ready for when it turns green. When it does, the whole line of cars should advance at one time, as a single unit. Quit fiddling with the radio. Make sure you machine is in gear. Balance your check book at home.

3. Which reminds me, when you are at the drive up ATM or remote teller at your bank and you have finished your transaction, don't sit there and block access to the machine or terminal while you record your transaction in your register or put your card away or comb your hair or floss your teeth. Pull ahead, THEN do that stuff. In the same vein, have your paperwork ready when you pull up to the machine/teller. Yes, of course, you can count your money before you leave or double check the deposit slip that was returned to you. BUT NO MORE THAN THAT. AND DO IT QUICKLY. You want to chat or stand around reading bank regulations GO INSIDE.

4. Eliminate the words "cut off" from your driving vocabulary. Do not say that you were "cut off." Unless the roadway was abruptly altered and your trip was made impossible to continue, you were not "cut off." Maybe you were momentarily inconvenienced or maybe even put out a little but not "cut off." You go out for an evening of merriment and, oh, say, you tell the bartender at the 400 Club on the West Bank that you used to change his diapers on the bar, then you will be cut off. Or, say that you're playing center field for the Yankees with runners on 1st and 2cnd and you are one-hopped a line drive half-way past 2cnd base. You throw the ball into a player called the "cut off man" and the ball's travel from your hand to the infield is "cut off" no doubt. It goes no further. However, if you are in the right hand lane and a driver merges in front of you a little too close, you are not "cut off." Your trip is not terminated. The road is not destoyed. Your car is not taken from you. You are not vaporized. You should have given them room to get in anyway.

5. Always put the remote back on top of the TV when you leave the room. Even if you are only going to the kitchen for cold drink.

6. Never be the one to take the last one of anything that is free, be it deviled eggs or fridge magnets.

7. Hold your commentary for outside, after the movie - or, if your conversation is that important maybe there is a better place than a movie theater to have it in.

8. Don't lounge on the weight benches and sit-up racks at the gym. Do your set and vacate the equipment. You want to stretch out for a nap, stay at home. And no, i am not looking at you and what you're wearing. I am wearing a hoodie and watch cap pulled down low for the very reason that i do not want to look at you nor you at me.

9. No piddling. No dawdling.

10. "Precycle." Practice this everyday. Start next time you go to Kroger. When the check out person goes to bag your purchases, let her put all of your groceries in 7 or 8 plastic bags. When she has completely finished, tell her that you do not want plastic bags. She will probably then move your items to paper bags. She may be a little put-out by this request but not nearly as put-out as when, after she has moved all of your items into paper bags, you tell her that, in fact, you didn't want paper either and that you have brought your own bags. This will make her really happy. She will be even happier when you begin to lecture her on why neither plastic nor paper is acceptable. Ask her this about plastic bags: "Where do they go?" Or help her estimate how much her store would save if it did not have to supply any bags at all to its customers. Take your time. Be sure to emphasize that the cost savings should be passed on to the customer. Pay no attention to the oaths and curses from the shoppers behind you; they're only mad that you scored the check-out lecture before you did.

Right then. I’m off “to the coast.” Wish me and Mark luck. It's been a hoot. That is all. Carry on.

yergreenpaljim